Shattered Us
by Agent0018
Summary: Black Widow betrayed them and so Captain America turned her out. Seven months later, they discover why.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hi. I can't even tell you how addicted I am to Stasha/Romanogers. And so, because I'm besotted with those two ever since Avengers came up, I decided to (finally) do something and contribute to this wonderful community of fanfiction. Alas, this is my first time submitting this so please be gentle and review. I probably would make this a three or four shots, but no longer than five chapters. This chapter is dedicated to ym4yum1 and Mystic Fantasy because both are awesome Romanogers writers. Love you guys.

Lovelots, Agent0018

* * *

Blood. _There was blood everywhere._ On the bathroom, on the floor and in the sheets.

Natasha bit her lip in pain, trying not to cry out.

The spasms were coming and going, each harder and more intense than the last. Her water had broken roughly eighteen hours ago and she knew that there were at least six more hellish hours to go. Her baby's father was nowhere in sight, probably cursing her name while trying to drink away the memory of them together (even if she knew he wouldn't even get drunk for it, but still), or maybe even in a damn near suicidal mission, all in an effort to forget her. Her _existence._

She was alone because she had to be. She was alone because she was running from her enemies both past and present. She was alone because her former teammates thought she _betrayed_ them.

She was alone because she, Natalia Romanova, master assassin and super spy, was _betrayed_.

* * *

_Seven months ago..._

"Duck!" Captain America, _Steve,_ yelled at her. She automatically followed her partner, now fiancée (still weird to think about that), and avoided a barrage of bullets aimed for her head. She quickly hid behind a car and aimed for the man who shot at her. Taking him down with a single shot because she needed to conserve her bullets (not that she still couldn't fight with her kicks and deadly jabs but she needed to take care of the goons without bodily contact because of her condition), she ran to cover Steve's back.

"I'll take care of this Cap! Go and get the vial before the rest of their company comes!" She shouted while shooting simultaneously three men. "Go!" She looked at Steve who was also trying to crane his neck to look at her. Natasha threw a couple of smoke bombs and Steve dragged her off to a fallen section of a wall.

"I will go and get that vial but you have to promise me that if the rest of their company do come, you get the hell out of here. Stay low and on the ground for twelve hours and then contact Nick. After the thirteenth hour, I'll meet you at the safe house." Steve said, while looking at her gorgeous green eyes that now held a deadly glint of determination. Nat nodded, and then grabbed the back of Steve's neck and dragged him down for a hard kiss. They stayed like that for a moment or two, desperately trying to draw strength from one another.

"You better be at the safe house, Rogers. I can't afford to wait another seventy years for you. Especially after _this_." Nat hissed at him before drawing back and slipping her Black Widow's face again. "Good luck Captain." She said and in a hail of bullets, left his side.

"Aw, come on, this is no time for sucking face Cap, not that I mind watching Nat and you, I just prefer to be you whenever you suck face with her-" Tony teased before using his repulsor beams to fire at a soldier trying to sneak up over the fallen debris "but I prefer to have the family jewels intact"

"Shut up, Stark" Steve said while punching in the code to open the metallic door towards the safe.

"...89#NLI. Got it! Now go inside Stark and have JARVIS deactivate the electronic traps in-" Steve didn't finish the sentence because at that moment, JARVIS told him that all defense systems were disabled inside. Steve managed to locate the chamber and then he gingerly stepped onto the platform that would deliver him the deadly vial.

The conveyor belt finally produced the bluish-green vial. Steve looked at it, the small little thing that has the power to kill an entire population of a small city once released into the air. Steve placed the vial in a Kevlar-lined pocket in his suit and got out of the chamber. Just before he called Tony, Bruce and Thor to fall back, an incapacitating blow to the back of his head made him collapse unconscious, but not before he saw Black Widow reach inside his suit and take the vial out.

Thor was the one who found him and helped him out of the building. They airlifted him after he was unable to wake up, fearing that Captain America's injury was more than a concussion.

They found Black Widow twelve hours later in the safe house, preparing to leave and holding the deadly vial that was taken away from Steve. SHIELD agents found her and attempted to take her into custody. Black Widow put up a hell of a fight but was ultimately taken down by a Taser-gun fired by a very reluctant Agent Hill. Subdued, they took her to the Triskelion holding cells.

Steve Rogers woke up two days later, after having sustained a rather severe concussion, but was healed completely because of the super serum. He was quietly informed of Black Widow's betrayal by Nick Fury. He couldn't believe it. Natasha Romanoff, his fiancee and one of the country's revered heroes. A _traitor. _He was deceived. When he was released from the infirmary another week later, he returned to a lonely apartment and gazed upon the surfaces littered with _their _things forlornly and with anger.

He took out a cardboard box and put Natasha's things inside. He started with the living room, then the kitchen, and the bathroom. When he came inside their bedroom, he took a deep breath-Natasha's scent - still lingered in the air. He just stood there for a minute trying to get his bearings and then he cleaned out their closets and finally the vanity. He came upon the box that once held the ring he gave to her when he proposed in London on one of the downtime of their many missions. He took the box and tossed it into the cardboard box that held all of Natasha's things and closed it.

Three hours later a knock sounded at his door. Three, hesitant knocks, but he heard it all the same.

"S-Steve?" Natasha called out. "I can explain. Let me in. Please."

He shuffled silently to the door and with a deep breath, opened it to reveal Natasha in jeans, tank top and a leather jacket with a gash on her forehead. There was a pang of concern that struck Steve's heart, but he reined it in. Nat immediately started talking. "Steve, it wasn't me, I swear. Yele - " "I packed your things and put it all in a box. You can keep the ring." Steve cut in.

A lengthy silence ensued. Looking back, Natasha couldn't recall how she managed to keep a straight face when inside she felt as if she was breaking, no - _dying_, inside. The look on Steve's face when he told her to get her things and keep her - _his - _ring was forever burned into her heart. She never wanted to see such dead eyes, their usual jovial lights extinguished by suspicion and disbelief. Her pride urged her to take her things, get out of there and disappear.

Her heart told her otherwise. For the sake of their unborn child, she needed to get through to Steve, needed to make him understand.

Steve retreated to the apartment and she followed, eventually stopping at their bedroom where the closets were opened and the vanity cleared. She looked at the big cardboard box that held the things she accumulated while living blissfully together with Steve. The reality of Steve throwing her out was comical and she was sure that the old Black Widow would have cracked a joke or two about it. But nothing was funny now.

She started to convince Steve again, to see the situation from her point. "Steve, please. Listen to me. Before the mission went FUBAR, I really needed to tell you somethi – "

"SHUT UP! JUST, PLEASE! DON'T YOU DARE GIVE ME LIES ANYMORE, ROMANOVA! I trusted you! With SHIELD, with the safety of the country, with the Avengers, and, hell, even with my heart! But what did you do? You _fucking _betrayed us! I don't want anything to do with you anymore. I couldn't stay with someone I can never trust!" Steve shouted at her.

Natasha was stunned. Never in the two years that she had been with Steve and the other three in which she was his partner did she hear him shout except at missions. And never at her. And certainly not with that tone that sounded like he would like nothing more than to treat her as the enemy.

"Rogers, listen to me. Just, please. If you ever loved me – "

"Don't you throw that obsolete fact that I _loved _you at my face! I loved the Natasha whom I trusted, not this sham of a woman in front of me. Certainly not you!" Steve seethed.

Tears that were bravely held back now spilled over and over her cheeks. Each word that came out of Steve's mouth were like nails driven through her heart. She was numb, unfeeling.

Steve looked a little shocked after his outburst and he paled slightly. Nat took a step back and tried to steady her wobbly knees. "Natasha, I – " Steve began but Natasha immediately cut in. "It's fine, I-I'm leaving. I'm leaving."

As she reached the hallway door and turned back to Steve. She took off the ring on her left hand and gently put it down at the coffee table. She raised her eyes and took one last look at Steve, memorized the planes of his handsome face, the planes she traced on many a night. At the lips she has kissed and bitten, soothed and licked. And the intense blue eyes that to her was a glimpse to heaven from her personal hell, eyes that were now stormy.

She committed it all to her memory, imprinted it in her heart. And then she left.

* * *

As she was fighting the need to push, Natalia heard the breaking of doors. Guns cocking and search lights flashing. _Fuck. _She has tried to avoid the agents sent by the Red Room but she could only go so far now that she was pregnant and especially now that she is giving birth.

She waddled to a switch near the bathroom mirror and flicked it. A reinforced steel door, twelve inches thick, sealed the bathroom. She flicked another switch and pressed a button, then a hallway appeared behind the sunken tub. She quickly went down the hallway where an red Audi waited for her. She quickly drove away from the apartment and went down the highway.

Just as she was getting relieved that she had evaded them this time, another car appeared on the right side of her car and slammed into her.

Nat's tires skidded but the road was icy and slick. The Audi knocked into a post and the impact of it nearly sent Natalia flying if it weren't for the seatbelt. Nevertheless, she hit her head, hard, on the side of the car. Trying desperately to stay awake, she tried to open the door of the car. It was jammed so she kicked it, again and again but a spasm again wracked her stomach.

Hunching over in pain, she rode it out until the pain passed. Kicking the door again, it finally gave out. She grabbed a gun and a hospital baby kit and wobbled away from the wreck. As she was nearing the cover of the trees, a hand shot out and grabbed her arm. She swung blindly but her center of gravity has shifted and she fell down.

"Well, well. Natalia Alianovna Romanova. We meet again. But it looks like I'm not bringing home one, but two hostages. Lucky night, eh?" Alexi Shostakov sneered down at her.

_Impossible. _It was the last thought Natalia had before the fist coming at her made her lose consciousness.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I'm very sorry for the late upload. Finals got the best of me, I'm afraid. Summer's nearly here and I'm vacationing somewhere technology is a foreign thing so... :/ But never fear because I will finish this. For those who are reading/following Second Chances, Second Tears I'm updating another chapter this week so watch out.

BTW, I am not good in Russian and I just used Google Translate so I'm sorry for any mistakes. I also took an artistic license to muck around the proper procedure of pregnancy and childbirth so if I raise a few eyebrows during this fic, just bear with me *winces*

This chapter is dedicated to RobertDowneyJrLove because I love you too :) Thanks for all the reviews and follows!

* * *

Natasha slowly blinked her eyes.

Her head ached as if someone had hit her with Thor's hammer and her arms and legs hurt like there was no tomorrow. She began to take into account her injuries like this was just any other mission and not the most important one in her life. Looking down, she sighed in relief seeing that her beloved bump was still there. She then tried moving her arms around, but the realization dawned that she was strapped down in a chair; wearing nothing put a papery hospital gown. There were tubes connected to her arms and a blue one attached to her stomach. A beeping machine was placed to her right side and with a dreadful comprehension, she saw a table full of torture instruments. She should know, because she used them herself before. Right in front of her there was a video camera set on a tripod, ready to take a video.

Mind racing, she thought of different ways to get out of the room, but she came up blank. Her arms and legs were firmly bound to the chair and she couldn't budge an inch even if she tried, and try she did. After a couple minutes of squirming, her mind went down on another horrifying track.

_My baby!_

Her water has broken hours ago and she had been out for what she guessed four hours. Surely she must be giving birth or even given birth by now. Trying to come up with a rational explanation to this, she barely noticed the dark-haired man that came inside.

"How the mighty has fallen," the man said, "Natasha Romanoff a.k.a Black Widow, top agent of SHIELD, savior of New York and by extension, the world. Is that really what you are? _фигня*! _You are a weakling compared to that glorious woman! A fallen and forgotten icon. You are a disgrace to everything you were once! You are _the _Black Widow, the ultimate of the Red Room and yet here you are, weak and pregnant by none other than our sworn enemy. _Captain America,_ of all people!" He spat the name as if it was something disgusting.

"What did you do to me?" She slurred, her tongue struggling to work properly around her dry mouth. She deliberately ignored the taunts made by Alexei, but deep inside her, what's left of heart lurches in pain. "What did you do to my child?"

"Don't worry, _дорогой*. _I am not doing anything. Yet." Alexei sneered. "You see, when you defected to America, the Red Room was left with subpar operatives, nowhere near as the original Black Widow. They were adequate, I guess, but we Russians are through with taking only enough. We, _I_, want it all." He said ominously, stroking the side of her face gently with a gloved hand. "The grand missions and operations set out for you were never fully realized, but we still had to push through using those defective agents. Long story short, it was a - as your beloved Americans would say - bloody mess. Then Captain America and his goons happened. All those years. Wasted. And now we found you, not only a traitor but the fiancée of the enemy! Pathetic!"

Natasha ignored Alexei's words. Her child took priority. "My child. What did you do? Why haven't I given birth yet?" She tried to sound strong, but inside she was deathly afraid of what they had possibly done.

Alexei went to the camera and pushed some buttons. A red light pulsed, indicating that it was now recording. Natasha felt a sickening premonition on what was to come.

"We put you on a serum that would prevent childbirth. Your water has broken, yes, but amazing what our doctors here could be _persuaded _to do. We reconstructed your amniotic sac and currently your child," he said while he knelt in front her and caressed her stomach lovingly, "is safely ensconced there, all warm and snug. With no idea of the pain to come."

"I wonder though, if a baby that small feels pain all the same?" the maniac laughed and sent a forceful slap to Natasha's face ringing in the room. Nat spit blood to the floor. She called on her training. _Cold, detached. Think through. _But how could she be detached when the very life of the child she loved is in the hands of this laughing maniac?

"What d-do you want?" She sounded out around the blood pooling in the insides of her cheeks.

"I want Captain America to beg, to see how pathetic Black Widow really is. I want Captain America to break, to see the light from your eyes fade as we torture you again and again. I want Captain America to go insane with the need to find you, all the while knowing that it is too late," he said while letting the light glint off the scalpel that he picked from the table, "and finally, I want him to die with the knowledge that his child will grow in the hands of his enemies, honing the child into a weapon to use against his beloved United States of America!"

Natasha could only look with horror upon Alexei. Alarm bells that were ringing inside her head are now ringing with a different urgency. They were going to use her and the child to subdue Steve. Hell if she let them.

She tried to seem disconnected and cold, "Good luck with that. He already thinks the worst of me anyway."

"Will he? When we will tell him the truth about what really went on that mission seven months ago, Natalia?" Alexei said silkily. Nat couldn't help but stare at him with defeated eyes. "No. _Don't_" She whispered. Alexei grabbed both Natasha's cheeks with one hand, forcing her to make a small 'o' with her mouth and made her face the camera. "Look to the camera, дорогой, and tell your fiance, I meant, _ex_-fiance who really took the vial and knocked him out cold. Tell him."

"No."

"Tell him. Now. Before I lose patience Natalia."

A beat passed, then two. "No, I won't" Natasha said with a finite tone in her voice.

Alexei punched her in the stomach. "I said tell the truth NOW!" Natasha bent over, or tried to, to ease the pain that was originating in her belly. _I'm sorry baby._ She started praying, if there really was a God like Steve so fastidiously believed, to save her child and forgive her. "No."

"Very well. If you won't, then I will," Alexei said. Scalpel in hand, he drags it along the Nat's arms, blood welling quickly. He had to give this Natalia credit though, because she barely flinched. The pain was there in her eyes though, and it made for a very interesting video. _Perfect. _

Alexei faced the camera, all the while tracing bloody patterns on Natasha's skin with the scalpel.

"Captain America, or shall I say Steve Rogers. Did you know that it wasn't this tragic woman who stole that vial from you? The current Red Room's agents may not be on par with Natalia Romanova but we definitely also have a quite competent assassin by the name of Yelena Belova." Alexei dropped the scalpel on the meta tray and proceeded to get two electric clamps and a wire. "She also is a lover of disguises and loves to dress up as her predecessor. Want to guess? Well, I'd bet you guessed right. Yelena loves to play dress up ... .as the Black Widow." As he was saying this, he wound the wire over Natasha's legs. He put a wad of cloth in her mouth, but it didn't really mask her pained moans when he turned on the electricity.

Oh, how he loves this. Now, if he could only make her scream...

_Avengers' Tower, New York (24 hours later)_

Steve's phone rang. He stopped from his rigorous tempo of punching the punching bag and he bent down to pick his phone from the bench.

"Hello?"

"This is Fury. We need you to come in."

"When?"

"I have a car waiting downstairs. We have a situation. You need to go now."

"I'll be there."

He turned off the screen and hopped in the shower for a minute. After his shower, he donned his Captain America suit and rode the car all the way to Triskelion.

"Director, you wanted to see me?" He asked.

"Sit down, Steve. Please." Fury said in a subdued voice.

The tone caught Steve off-guard. Fury doesn't sound subdued. If he ever did, then hell had already frozen over. He'd have to ask Stark and Banner about that. Maybe even Barton. He sat down on the chair in front of Fury's desk and looked at the monitor and video that appeared.

The face of a Natalia Alianovna Romanova stared back at him, and at her back was a dark-haired man. "Captain..." Fury said, and Steve felt a strange sense of foreboding.

Fury pressed play.

Thirty minutes later, with a lot of revelations and feeling as if the world has caved in around him, _the _Captain America passed out.

* * *

*фигня - Bullshit

*дорогой - darling


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I know, I know. Believe me, I hate myself too. Life has just been too busy for me and my muse is not cooperating / Oh well. Alright, so this chapter is basically a bonus chapter. This chapter would focus on Steve and how he reacted to the video. Thank you to The-Captain-Widow for the prompt :D Anyways, this is also dedicated to her/him and to all angst lovers out there. This is also going to be short-ish because it centers on Steve but I'll make it up to you in the coming chapters :) Aaaaannnd, if you have any requests or prompts, I'm begging you, leave something :D

**Warning: Graphic (maybe not so) descriptions of torture.**

As always I do not own Marvel, just the plot.

* * *

_No. No, no, no. Oh, God, please let this be a nightmare. Just a horrible nightmare._

Steve chanted again and again in his mind while chucking the remains of his breakfast down the toilet.

He saw the video Fury played out for him. All that he believed in for the past seven months came crashing down on him, shattering the hatred and disgust he felt towards Natasha, only to be replaced with utter desolation and remorse.

His mind, as if bent on torturing him again and again, went back to the fateful video, replaying in slow motion and highlighting each painful revelation. Natasha. Oh, God, Natasha. _It's nothing less than what I deserve,_ he said to himself despondently.

* * *

"Sit down, Steve. Please."

Those words should come with a Grade-A warning seeing it came from Nick.

His eyes were drawn to the screen, where Nat's face was plastered. Nick turned up the volume, making Steve hear what the dark-haired man was saying.

_"...you on a serum that would prevent childbirth. Your water has broken, yes, but amazing what our doctors here could be persuaded to do. We reconstructed your amniotic sac and currently your child is safely ensconced there, all warm and snug. With no idea of the pain to come."_

He heard the words but wasn't comprehending them. Oh, he understood them alright, but his mind decided not to take them, _accept them_, yet. Because he knew that if he did, he would never finish this video, which is imperative, and just go lose his mind. The man slapped Natasha so hard that she spat out blood. Steve's hands clenched in rage, nails digging into his palms and nearly drawing blood but still he kept them balled up.

_"What d-do you want?" She sounded out around the blood pooling in the insides of her cheeks._

_"I want Captain America to beg, to see how pathetic Black Widow really is. I want Captain America to break, to see the light from your eyes fade as we torture you again and again. I want Captain America to go insane with the need to find you, all the while knowing that it is too late," he said while letting the light glint off the scalpel that he picked from the table, "and finally, I want him to die with the knowledge that his child will grow in the hands of his enemies, honing the child into a weapon to use against his beloved United States of America!"_

Then all hell broke loose. Steve sank to his knees, letting out a horrendous cry that should have never passed the lips of a man, much less the Captain America. It was the cry of someone broken, of someone whose heart was torn out, only to find out that he himself has done so. The video continued to play, with each word and each assault to Natasha was another nail driven to seal his justtly-earned coffin.

_"Good luck with that. He already thinks the worst of me anyway._"

Another resounding thump, driving the nails deeper and deeper.

_"Will he? When we will tell him the truth about what really went on that mission seven months ago, Natalia?"_

_"No. Don't" She whispered._

_"Look to the camera, дорогой, and tell your fiance, I meant, ex-fiance who really took the vial and knocked him out cold. Tell him."_

She refused. Of course, she would. Steve was past the point of begging Natasha to betray him, tell the man anything he wants to hear, not caring that this was all recorded and done hours ago. He knew Natasha, and Natasha would never hurt him as long as it was in her power to do so. The man continued to push her, to tell the "truth" but still she resisted, earning her a violent punch to her stomach. That housed her child. _His_ child. _Oh, God. No. Please. _He can only look in horror while Natasha tried to hide the pain from the camera and failing miserably. He watched as the man cut open Natasha's arms, watched as the precious blood streamed down her arms and dripped onto the floor.

Another cry was wrenched from his heart, from his very soul, at the pain that he has inadvertently caused her and their child. He could never forgive himself. Dimly, he registered Nick calling out for other agents to restrain him as he was doing his best to beat himself up, stopping every now and then to dry-heave. Arms were wound around his bulky torso, trying to calm him down but he was a super soldier and it was for naught. He was busily trying to shake off the other agents that he almost didn't hear the words being spoken by The Man.

_"… shall I say Steve Rogers. …. know that it wasn't this … who stole that vial ….? The current Red Room's agents … not be on par with Natalia Romanova but we definitely also have a … assassin by the name of Yelena Belova. She … is a lover of disguises and loves to dress up as her predecessor. …. Well, I'd bet you guessed right. … loves to play dress up ...as the __**Black Widow**__."_

Really, nothing should have surprised him at this point anymore, but it did. His mind flashes back to their last conversation, to where Natasha had wanted to explain something but he cut her off, insisting that she leave him and all but declaring to her that he didn't love her anymore.

If only he had waited, if only he had let her explain, then she wouldn't be tortured like an animal while pregnant with their child.

_Their child._

If anything happened to their small miracle he knew that forgiveness will be the last thing he deserves. He will be more than happy to cast himself into the deepest part of hell and count the punishment lacking to what he has done. His heart prayed like never before. If only Natasha and their child would be spared, then he would gladly die and burn.

At this point, his strength has left him. Not the serums' but his spirit. He barely flinched as Natasha was electrocuted (though he thought he felt every shock), as Natasha was water boarded (though he himself was drowning) and as each of Natasha's perfect nails were pulled off one by one (though he felt the excruciating pain).

He was past the point of redemption.

He could only hope that after he has saved them both, (and he will, even if it's the last thing he'll do), that he would die because that is what he truly deserves.

And with that last thought, Captain America passes out.

* * *

There! Whaddya think? Please R&amp;R! It keeps me going.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N**: Here you go guys :) Uhh, a little warning though? If you think that the previous chapters were angsty then please brace yourself for the coming chapters.

Also, I remember that little note at the start of the first chapter where I projected that this would be no longer than five chapters? Well, as I was developing the plot for this story it got longer and longer. It would be definitely MORE than five chapters. I don't know if that's a good thing or not. Haha. Oh well.

AND OH MY GOD. AGE OF ULTRON IS SHOWING HERE AND I'M WATCHING IT TOMORROW I JUST HOPE THERE ARE ROMANOGERS/STASHA MOMENTS OH MY GOD.

This chapter is dedicated to Bluemachine :*

* * *

**_Russia_**

Cold. Sheer, bone-numbingly cold. That was what Natasha was feeling.

She reasoned darkly that she should have gotten used to the cold by now. After all, coldness was the only thing she knew by heart.

The brutal winters of Russia, the stares of people at a homeless orphan, and even the way her teachers (and she used that term loosely) in the Red Room treated her.

She could only count in one hand the few times that she felt a spark of something else deep inside.

A whisper of comfort, a sliver of sunlight, maybe a promise of a smile.

Everything else she knew was stark, unforgiving and cold. The first time she felt anything other than the cold was when Clint lowered the arrow poised at her heart. She was very sure that had it been any other man but Clint, she would have been dead in a moment. But, as it was, she felt something unfurling inside her. Maybe it was rage, thinking that Clint thought she was inferior therefore he was not fighting her, but she admitted that it was _gratitude._

The second time was when Fury recognized her. Believed in her. After Clint had brought her in and told Fury that they could trust her, Fury just looked at her with his only eye that saw beyond what she was and told her in his own eloquent way, "Welcome home, Agent Romanoff". Again, there was this tingly feeling inside that alarmed her. It was in that moment that she knew that she finally had what she was searching for. _Acceptance_.

The third and the last time was when Steve told her that he loved her. All her life she believed that love was for children. She isn't so guileless to assume that in the distant past her own _parents _didn't love her in their own way. Natasha was sure they did. She dimly remembers a comfortable, muscular arm hugging her tightly and being smothered by her mother's fragrant and vibrant red hair then wondering when her own frizzy hair would be as lovely as hers.

But it was exactly that. She felt the shadow of love as a child, and she had no further proof that love could exist.

That was until Steven Grant Rogers happened to her.

When the fateful words went out of Steve's mouth, she felt the need to escape. To run and hide, preferably forever. However, it was phrased so nonchalantly, so _mundanely_, as if it was an accepted fact and not something that had just turned her upside down. After Steve so carelessly threw those words at her, he was immediately called to a mission God-knows-where, leaving her with nothing but time to digest that little fact.

She was tempted to go away and to forget everything behind, reasoning to herself that she was not worthy of Captain America's love and devotion. Natasha very well knew it was futile because Steve could out-stubborn everyone else (and she even admits that Steve could out-stubborn her too), and eventually, Steve would convince her to love him too (at that point, she really didn't need much convincing).

And so she decided to fall into the unknown with Steve. It wasn't so bad (understatement of the century). It was actually great. Maybe even out of this world.

That spark that she felt? It was now a raging inferno, and Natasha was surprised she didn't even miss the safety and familiarity of the cold anymore. The heat was what kept her going. She felt the full force of Steve's love and the passion, safety, and excitement it brought her. For the first time in her life, Natasha felt the true meaning of _love_.

Then that stupid mission went FUBAR.

Recalling Steve's face as he callously threw her out, as he said that he could never trust her, as he basically _unloved_ her, she felt that inferno sizzle out and fade into embers. She couldn't blame Steve because until now there are still parts of herself that she doubts, and she seriously fears that maybe Steve was right, maybe she could never be trustworthy.

That was why as she was lying in the cramped, dirty and dank cell that Alexi placed her in she let herself feel the cold. She let the embers slowly die, one by one, as they were replaced the cold that had represented sanctuary and refuge for most of her fucked-up life. Surely she could be allowed to be selfish this one time. To just _let go, _to stop resisting and to stop being Black Widow. She was tired.

However, one ember refused to go out.

The clanking of chains sounded as she moved her shackled and bloody hand to her stomach where her son has just kicked her, as if to remind Natasha of his existence.

"Hello, James. This is your mother again. I feel kind of stupid doing this, быть любимой, but the doctors Mom saw said that this could be a good bonding experience for us. What do you say? Is it nice to hear Mommy's voice?" She rasped lowly, apprehensive that her tormentors outside of the small cell door could hear. James kicked her in the ribs, a bit stronger this time, and she winced. "I bet you're impatient, aren't you? You just have to wait a little more, малютка, I'm sure Daddy would-," she broke off pensively. "Maybe Uncle Clint, would save us. Just be patient. Hang in there because Mommy couldn't protect you well outside. It's a scary place here."

She ran her hand over her stomach once again, feeling for the tender areas where Alexi's goons beat her. Fortunately, she managed to turn the majority of her stomach away from them but her sides, which suffered the most, still hurt like hell. She huffed as she tried to sit up; her vision was disturbingly spinning around and it was most probably due to her concussions. She wondered not for the first time if Steve ever looked for her, but she immediately pushed it to the back of her mind. There was no use for that here. Instead, she started humming to her child and whispering reassurances as she was counting down the minutes until Alexi appeared again to drag her off to his torture room. Man, she couldn't believe that she ever married that guy.

Three hundred seconds later, the door opened with a blinding glare of light coming in.

"Good morning! How is my favourite torturee for this day? I bet you're just hungry aren't you?" Alexi said while munching on an apple. Damn, she craved for apples since day one of her pregnancy and the heavenly crunch of the fruit made her mouth water involuntarily.

"Do you want one?" Alexi held out his hand.

Natasha gave him his deadliest glares.

"Oh, I just love it when Black Widow comes up to the surface. I'm so tired of playing with _Natasha Romanoff, _I prefer the spunk of Black Widow." Alexi laughed.

"That's where you're wrong, Alexi. Natasha, Natalia, Romanoff, Romanova, and Black Widow are one. You couldn't separate us even if you tried." Natasha spat back, eyes glinting with a new fervour.

Alexi looked incensed. "Strip her then prep her for the room. We're sending Captain America another video." He barked at the two lackeys behind him. "I want her there in two minutes."

She was expecting this but it didn't stop the frisson of fear that went down her spine.

_We'll get through this, James_. She promised to her child, her last ember.

_I promise you will never go out._

If it's the last thing she does, she will make sure that her ember will become a flame and not even these pathetic fuckers like Alexi and company could put it out. Never.

* * *

**_Avengers Tower_**

Tony was working with Bruce in the lab when he heard Clint shout.

"Rogers! Fuck you! You promised never to hurt her and yet you fucking did, you prick!" Clint thundered.

Tony and Bruce immediately went over to see what was causing Clint's ire. Upon arriving, they were surprised to see Clint _pummeling _Steve and even more surprised to observe Steve doing nothing to defend himself. Steve was lying prone, absorbing the pain each time Clint's fist connected with his body.

"You promised me that you would never hurt her and I fucking trusted you!" That last bit was rather forced home by a powerful right hook from Clint and Steve was sent to the floor, spitting out blood.

Steve didn't say anything. Tony and Bruce were completely baffled yet as Clint tried to make his way to Steve again, they both intervened. Bruce helped Steve up while Tony went to Clint.

"Whoa there, Legolas! Why are you thrashing Cap? Better yet, why is _the _Captain America letting you beat him up?" Tony asked while struggling to contain Clint who was trying to break free?

Clint wasn't listening, however. "Do you even know what you've done? We all thought you loved her but you've gone and done this, _everything_, to her!"

Tony and Bruce both snapped their head to Clint. _What?_

They were more alarmed by the tears glistening in the eyes of Clint. Clint never cries, but…

"I just have to save them. Have to save them both." Steve declared softly. He raised his head to look at Clint when Tony noticed his red-rimmed eyes and the tears that were spilling over.

"W-wait. Hold up. What are you guys talking about?" Bruce asked, unease lacing his voice.

"Tell them! Tell them yourself what you've done to Natasha!" Clint roared at Steve.

Steve's hands were now at his head and he was shaking his head, muttering under his breath. Tony could just make out the words "tortured", "pregnant", "my fault" and "God, no" when JARVIS spoke.

"If I may, sir?" The A.I. spoke softly.

"Explain, J", Tony commanded.

JARVIS produced a screen where a video was playing. It was dark at first but then he immediately saw Natasha strapped to the chair.

"Stop, please just stop. I can't bear to hear her voice. No. Please," Steve begged, averting his face and not looking at the screen. Clint was the same; they couldn't bear to watch it.

Steve stood up and wiped his face. "I'm going to my room and packing my things. I have to find them. I have to."

Clint looked at him and said, "I'll see you at the helipad in thirty minutes." Steve wearily nodded and they both left.

Tony and Bruce, however, was glued to the screen. When Natasha's pained moans start, they paled. Bruce was getting greenish, and not in the good way, so Tony decided to cut it.

"Easy, pal. We're gonna find her." Tony reassured his friend. "Yes. We. Will." Bruce gritted out. "See you in the Helipad in twenty minutes, Bruce." Tony said, then left.

Steve whirling around his apartment, trying to cram everything he thought useful to the most important rescue mission of his life into a bag.

Clothes.

First Aid.

Guns.

Ammunitions.

Food.

He went in, out of the rooms, looking for everything that could help Natasha. He spotted the little stuffed bear he won for Nat on one of their dates. It was perfect to give to – _No, focus Rogers. _He considered everything around him and that was when he saw the tiny fleece blanket. It was perfect for a baby.

That thought alone was enough to send him to his knees and make him want to tear his heart and mind out. Natasha and their child is in the hands of a madman and every minute wasted was another strike against him. He carefully folded the blanket with tears silently falling from his eyes. Satisfied that what he packed was enough, he moved to pick up his shield. This time it felt wrong, however. He was supposed to be Captain America, the paragon of all virtues, and yet he managed to commit almost every vice against the woman he professed to love.

_You also said that you'll never trust her, that you don't love her, _a dark voice whispered inside his head. He shook it off, focusing instead in saving her. Saving _them._

Steve met up with Clint at the helipad but was not surprised to see both Tony and Bruce present there. They were a team. He should expect that they would want to come.

_They were supposed to be a team, yet they easily turned their back on one of their own_. The voice again whispered. Steve ignored it.

They all acknowledged him with a nod. "Tony, Bruce, Clint, this is the most important mission of my life. I understand if you don't want to come with me. I have reparations to make, and they won't be pretty. However, if you still decide to help me, thank you."

"Our only regret is letting her go without hearing her side," Bruce said, tone subdued.

Steve decided not to speak because suddenly there was a lump blocking his throat. He gestured to them to get into the waiting helicopter. Putting on their headsets, Clint told them that they were first going to the Triskelion to pick up information and to suit up for battle.

When they got there, they were immediately ushered in to Director Nick's office.

Nick and Maria Hill were the only ones in the office and they were obviously waiting for them. Maria immediately opened a hologram map on the table, gesturing at them to come and see the map.

"We ran tracers from the video they sent us. Though crude, we were able to guess where they were holding her. She's in Russia, in some remote part near Siberia. The location is hard to get to, especially that the snow is thick and there are no safe houses along the way. The enemy also has radar that picks up electronic activity in a three mile radius." She informed them.

"However, a quinjet could deliver you to four miles out. You have to cover the rest. Luckily, according to satellite images, you could go to the northern part of the base, which is less guarded," Nick added, "We have reason to believe that Agent Romanoff is being held underground, so your best bet would be to have a quiet in-and-out," Tony started to speak up but Nick raised his hand, "but I know that quiet is not your forte. So go in, tear the place down, rescue Agent Romanoff and her child, kill every one of those bastards who thought to break Black Widow and come back, international issues be damned."

Nick turned to Steve, "Go get her, Captain."

"I fully intend to."

* * *

**_Russia_**

She cried out in pain. Damn, she couldn't help it. Her body was strong, nearly at the peak of human perfection but it still has limits.

"Tie her up."

They did, and they put a wad of cloth in her mouth. They put some helmet-like contraption at her head and turned the voltage at the highest.

She clenched her bloody, nail-less hands, but almost at the same moment let go because of the pain.

_"__They are not coming for you. They left you here to rot. They are the enemies. Captain America. Lied. To. You."_

A few minutes passed.

"No. Fuck you." She gritted out.

"Again!" A terrible voice bellowed.

…..

_"__They are not coming for you. They left you here to rot. They are the enemies. Captain America. Lied. To. You."_

"It's not working! HAHAHA!" she laughed maniacally, oddly contrasting with the tears streaming down her face.

"Another!"

…..

_"__They are not coming for you. They left you here to rot. They are the enemies. Captain America. Lied. To. You."_

"YOU CANNOT BREAK ME! I AM BLACK WIDOW. _THE _BLACK WIDOW! HA!" She screamed at her persecutors.

"Five more!"

…..

…..

…..

…..

…..

And then they changed their tune…

_"__You are the reason. He will die rescuing you and it's your entire fault. Which is very sad because He. Does. Not. Love. You. Anymore._

Natasha went silent.

…..

_"__You are the reason. You are unlovable, unworthy, untrustworthy. He never wanted you."_

No words came out of her mouth.

…..

_"__You are, and always will be, alone."_

"Stop," Natasha whispered.

Laughter, evil laughter, echoed.

"No more. No more!" she pleaded.

"Again!" they said

…..

She was led back to her cell and they pushed her through the small door quite roughly. They slapped the chains into her hands and feet then left her.

Natasha crawled to one side and curled into herself as much as she could. She started rocking back and forth and tried to remember, but the only thing she can are the facts she kept muttering.

_"__I am Natalia Alianovna Romanova, graduate of Red Room, and the lethal Black Widow. No more."_

Repeating it once, twice, or maybe a thousand times, she lost track of time. Or maybe time lost track of her. She didn't know. _Nobody. Nobody. Nobody._

The sounds of guns, explosions and the roar of an angry Hulk filtered in through her shattered consciousness. But no hope, not even a shard of it, ignited inside her.

_Nobody. Nobody. Nobody._

Nobody was left to save here.

* * *

быть любимой – beloved

малютка – little one

Whew. There. Tell me what you think of it. Have a good day! Imma watch Age of Ultron now :D Also, please, please, pretty please REVIEW :)) It makes me smile :)

xoxoxo Agent0018


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I've just seen Age of Ultron and ... OH GOD I'M GONNA STOP. As expected, AoU butchers Romanogers but, hey, that's what fanfiction is for, right? *ugly crying*

So here goes my frustration. I'm sorry for the late upload. I had to see the movie three more times before finally coming to terms (well, not so) that Romanogers went down like Pietro. But this is the Marvel Cinematic Universe so ….

This chapter is for MariShal because of reasons. I love your idea. :)

* * *

They see her in the small and cramped room, curled in a fetal position.

There were streaks of dried blood on her grayish pale skin, and her distended stomach was covered in fading yellowish bruises. Her leg was in an odd angle, and her back was crisscrossed with whip marks. Eyes that were open yet were unseeing flitted here and there. Shivering, she kept on muttering, "Nobody, nobody, nobody."

This was Black Widow as Captain America made her. _Broken_.

Steve squeezed inside the tiny space. He knelt down, shield clanging against the dirty floor, and with shaking hands gently touched her bloody shoulder. She flinched at that, and Steve felt his heart burn.

"Nat, I'm here. You're safe," _safe?_ _You are the reason for this, Rogers_. Steve ignored that thought and instead tried to see how he could carry Natasha out of there without jostling her and their child too much. "Tony. I found her. We're at the eastern side, down the old barracks. I'm getting her out of here. The quinjet ready, Clint?"

"Roger that Steve. The med kit is also ready for her. How does she look? Any major wounds?" _Lots of it. Not only on the outside. _Steve thought. "We need to get to the Tower immediately. No first aid can help her at this point," Steve said to Clint. An expletive was uttered by Clint. "Yeah, that pretty sums it up."

"Is she okay? Tell me, Cap!" The sounds of battle permeated his headset and he realized that was Tony. "Get her immediately to the quinjet. We're covering the eastern side and I'm gonna get Bruce in a minute after you guys get to the jet."

"Copy that. Over" Steve said.

"_Nobody, nobody, nobody_," her words haunted him. "Baby, I'm here. I promise you, everything's gonna be fine. Please Nat," he didn't know who he was kidding, himself or Natasha. Everything for damn sure is not fine.

"I'm going to lift you, okay? I won't jostle you too much," Steve slipped one of his arms under Natasha's neck and the other at the back of her knees. He made sure that her broken leg wasn't touching anything before he quickly and steadily got out of the cell. She was lighter than he remembered and that alarmed him because she was lighter _and_ pregnant. Her face looked gaunt, but she was still so beautiful it made Steve's heart ache. There was a fragile air around her now, like a flower crusted with ice crystal.

Any minute she could break.

That thought was enough to make Steve's footsteps faster. "Tony, we're going out. Cover us."

"Copy that, Cap. Hang on." A beat later, Tony yelled "Go!" and Steve went out of the eastern exit. The sounds of battle and guns and Hulk's roar filled the air, but Steve kept on running. He was holding his future in his arms and he wasn't ever letting go.

After three minutes of running, he finally reached the quinjet. Clint opened the hatch and immediately helped Steve. "Set her on the table." Clint ordered in a terse voice. Steve instantly complied. "Tony, we secured Nat. Get Bruce now, we need him."

"Affirmative. Rage monster en route to you. Whoa! Easy, Bruce!" A roar could be heard over the earpiece but Steve disregarded it. It was uncharacteristic for him to ignore a teammate but he supposed this time he could justify it. Natasha needed him and there is no force in heaven or in hell that could separate him from her now.

"We need to stop this bleeding," Steve said while gathering what he needed from the med kit. Gauzes, bandages, wipes, antiseptic creams and a plethora of other medical instruments were laid out in another table. "We'll have to start an IV drip for her. Clint, you have to set her leg first. Damn it, where's Bruce? Tony!"

"Incoming Cap. Fifteen second, tops," the inventor said.

There was a flurry of movement as Clint and Steve tried to save and stabilize the woman they both love, albeit differently. Steve attached two sticky pads to her chest with wires connecting to a screen to monitor Natasha's vitals. The moment they touched her skin, Natasha recoiled, her weak arms coming up to swat the pads away. "No more. Please, no more," Natasha hazily pleaded. "Oh, fuck," the obscenity coming from Clint shouldn't have attracted Steve's attention but it was uttered with pure horror that he couldn't help but look at the archer.

Clint, sensing that Steve was looking at him, gently took Natasha's trembling hands. "Look at her _fingertips._"

Steve, who was previously looking for any major wounds on Natasha, overlooked the seemingly minor ones but infinitely more painful. He looked at her fingers, bloody stumps where the nails should have been. A vise gripped Steve's stomach and he felt rage, unquenchable rage, for Natasha. If it's the last thing he would do, he would make that man pay for him.

_This is your fault too. _The annoying voice reminded him. Steve swallowed then looked up to see that Bruce and Tony were getting inside the jet.

"Clint, get us out of here. Banner, Tony. Natasha, she's…" Steve trailed off, the lump in his throat making it hard for him to speak further. Bruce, God bless him, noted Steve's distress. "Get me my bag," the doctor told Steve.

"Is that little Red?" Tony asked, aghast to see their _former_ teammate like this. "I'd be happy to go back there and fire a few more repulsor beams through their black hearts, Cap. Just say the word."

"Don't go anywhere Tony, I need you here," Bruce said. "Try to set up a sterile tent around her. She has a version of Steve's serum but we aren't taking any chances with the child." Silence covered them for a few seconds, all of them staring at Natasha's stomach.

Tony moved first, and quickly assembled the tent. Bruce worked feverishly over Natasha, cleaning her wounds and putting creams to the infected ones. Steve however, for a minute was glued to where he was.

He raised his hands, wanting to touch Natasha's belly. The one that housed her child. _Their_ child, Most of her stomach was painted with fading yellow and brown bruises but he managed to find a relatively bruise-free area. Hesitatingly, he gently touched her front.

Their child kicked.

Natasha's left leg shot out and caught Steve straight in the chest. Rolling and falling from the table, she wasted no time in trying to stand up. Her face was violent like an animal cornered. Alarms went blaring and beeping. Natasha's eyes for a moment become furious and so focused that Steve almost believed that Black Widow had returned.

"Don't touch my child," she said menacingly.

Bruce and Tony looked in on amazement. Here was a wounded, pregnant woman with a broken leg, lacerations and incisions covering her body standing alone and ready to kick anyone's ass. If the situation wasn't actually really grave, Tony might've cracked a joke or two about it. As it was, the inventor approached Natasha carefully.

"Red, we need you to lie down," Tony said point-blank. "You're wounded beyond recognition and standing on one leg isn't doing any good for the tiny arachnid inside you."

Natasha's wild eyes went to him, "Nobody's taking him away. Nobody. I'd die first."

"Nobody's taking anybody from anyone, Natasha, because they'll have to go through me first," Steve's deep voice rang out, "Please, Natasha. We need to take care of you. You and our child."

Natasha's eyes glazed over the moment she heard Steve. It was like watching a fierce tiger be subdued by fire. She slid down the floor and curled in on herself. "He's not coming. He's not coming. Nobody's coming. Nobody. Nobody. Nobody." Tears were coursing down her face but it didn't seem to register with her.

Steve gingerly knelt in front of her and scooped her up. He set her on the table while Bruce reattached the wires to her. "I'm here, Nat. I'm here. I'm never letting you go. I can't," Steve said in a low voice while patting her head and simultaneously trying to be out of Bruce's way. "Nobody. Nobody. Nobody's coming for me. For us," Natasha cried softly, eyes shut in pain.

"Autopilot engaged," JARVIS voice announced over the P.A.

A moment later, Clint was at the other side of Natasha. "Hey, Nat. You look terrible," the archer tried to say with a light note but miserably failing. He couldn't keep the worry out of his tone.

At his voice, Natasha's eyes opened and immediately focused on Clint. "Clint? You're here," the pain in her voice was evident and Steve almost felt the same deep inside him.

"Clint, please. _Help me_," that one word resounded deep with each of the men inside the quinjet. Natasha, never, ever, _ever_, asked for help. "_Help_," her voice, hoarse though it was, conveyed enough misery for all of them. Especially for Steve.

Her fiancée, calling for help at another man.

Not _him._

Him who should have been the one to protect her, to believe in her. In the end, it was him who betrayed her_. _It was him who cut their ties with each other.

Clint inched closer to Natasha, hands wavering and trying to find a harmless place to touch her. He settled for her hair. "We're patching you up, Nat. Hang on, okay? You and your baby. I swear after all we've done, if you don't make me and the rest godparents for this child, I'll kick your ass again," the tears in the eyes of the archer threatened to spill over. "Or maybe you could kick my ass. I don't care as long as you let us fix you, alright?"

Bruce looked at Steve, "Cap, we need to sedate her. The additional emotional stress isn't conducive for her mental state and we have no idea how deep this goes." Steve looked at Natasha's wet and vacant eyes and nodded. The doctor motioned for Tony to get the sedatives and he injected it to her IV.

"_I'll be here, Nat. You won't ever be alone again." _Steve promised her and kissed her cheek. Clint did the same, then went back to the cockpit. Natasha's struggles faded with the sedatives in her bloodstream. With a final squeeze of her hand, Steve left the transparent tent to make room for Tony and Bruce who were still working frantically. He sat down on a stool in front of the tent, watching as the two left inside try to save the woman he loved.

* * *

She was lost.

The lines of reality and fantasy were so blurred she couldn't distinguish which is which.

Memories assaulted her. The Red Room, Petrovich, Alexi, Yelena, Clint, Fury, Tony, Bruce, Thor. And… _Steve. _Pain engulfed her being.

She had a hallucination (or was it a memory? She honestly couldn't tell) of being carried across the snow. An inhuman roar, sounding suspiciously like the Hulk, the whir of Iron Man's repulsor beams and gunfire.

The hallucination then faded into the Battle of New York, taking down the numerous Chitauri soldiers and protecting civilians.

Jumping off a round, red, blue and white shield.

A graveyard, a folder, a kiss.

The images continued to churn, and it absolutely made no sense. There was no order to it, all random things that she had filed away for years but she couldn't shake the niggling feeling that somehow, something was important.

Then she felt her baby kick.

That was when she became lucid, or at least, as lucid as she could be with blood loss. She tried to be as fierce as she could and someone who looks suspiciously like Tony approached her. She felt dread because Alexei has made another way to break her in. Using her _ex-teammates_ against her would eventually break her, not that she would tell anyone.

Pain was coursing up and down her body and she felt that at least one bone in her body was broken. Then and there, she slipped again to another hallucination because _he _was there. He came closer, promising to never leave her. Bullshit. Everyone left her.

The minutes went by alone in her own head, filled with confusion and anger and worry. Another lucid moment came when she heard Clint's voice. It felt and sounded so real that she asked for help. She begged for Clint to help her because she knows that she's approached her limit. A moment or two, later, she was being dragged down by lethargy and sleepiness. _No! I have to get to Clint! Have… to … _

It was the last thought she had before oblivion claimed her.

* * *

After stabilizing her, there wasn't anything more to be done than to wait for them to get to the Avengers Tower where they could do surgery. Bruce checked the vitals and motioned for Tony to come closer.

"How long has he been staring at nothing?" the doctor quietly asked. "Long enough. He's been there ever since we started working on Natasha," Tony said with a soft tone. "Do you want to call Dr. Cho? She could be at the Tower two, three hours after we get Natasha there."

"Might as well. The damage is so extensive that maybe we need Dr. Cho's technology," he agreed. "In the meantime, we should tell Steve what we discovered."

They looked at the supersoldier who was currently doing the universal what-do-I-do pose with his hands cradling his head. Steve looked utterly _defeated._ Not a word that Tony would normally associate with Captain America.

"I don't think now's a good time. He already has enough to process as it is. It could wait," Tony said gently. "Let him regroup."

Bruce nodded, then sat down for a long night.

* * *

There it is, folks. Sorry it's kinda sort. :(

You know the drill. Read and review! :)


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: Hi? I know, I know. I suck (and that's an understatement) at keeping promises. Thing is, my laptop has given up the ghost and I am writing this now with my father's laptop and he doesn't know that I write these kind of stuff. I'm doing covert writing here people, and I nearly want to just forget about this fanfic and abandon it but I just couldn't. That's the pull you guys have on me.

Anyways, here it is, and yes, again I am playing with science and fantasy a bit with the medical procedures. I accept corrections for the medical jargon and terms I use here, so if you have something to correct, feel free to tell me :) I also kind of want to tie this in with Age of Ultron but I don't know if I should. Sorry for the long A/N :( Hope you enjoy this one!

* * *

The quinjet arrived at the Avengers Tower an hour later. Together with Clint, Steve carefully pushed the bed carrying Natasha to the medbay while Tony and Bruce immediately went first to prepare the area for Natasha's arrival. The place looked state-of-the-art but that was the default setting for anything Tony owns, except perhaps for the small indoor garden Tony grew (or at the very least tried to). If it wasn't for Pepper tending to the plants, it would have been a barren landscape right now. It wasn't pretty but Tony was strangely obsessed with it.

The room was lined with the various latest medical instruments and machines, with JARVIS controlling everyone of them. Near the west wall there were six beds large enough to accommodate even Thor who was the largest of them all, Steve being a close second. At the center of the room, however, was a large surgical bed where Clint cautiously transferred Natasha from the gurney. Steve set about helping Tony and Bruce with whatever he could help with but it turned out that the Science Bros were as ready as they could ever be to piece together Black Widow as best as they could.

"JARVIS? Any updates on Dr. Cho's location?" Banner asked the AI harriedly.

"She is still half an hour out, sir. I have managed to notify her earlier than you asked me to, and she is currently now entering the United States airspace." The AI responded calmly, but with an undertone of something akin to worry. Steve had often wondered if Tony had intentionally made the AI to act more human-like than the inventor would like to admit but Stark always denied it.

"Well, keep us updated J. Meanwhile, why don't you contact Agent Hill and Fury?" Stark said.

"Already done, sir. And might I suggest that we prepare Dr. Banner's laboratory for Dr. Cho's arrival?" The AI responded.

"Do what you can JARVIS. _Please_." This time it was Steve who answered the AI. "It would be my _greatest _pleasure, Captain. I do hope that Agent Romanoff would recover most speedily from this." After JARVIS said that, Clint's phone lit up with a text from Agent Hill saying that they were nearing the Tower. Clint picked his phone up and eased away from the frantic actions of Banner and Stark trying to save Nat. Steve was off to the side, hands tightly clenched and jaw so hard it looked like stone.

Clint dialed Agent Hill's number and waited for her to pick up.

"Agent Barton." The steely voice of the female agent greeted him.

"Agen- Agent Hill." He started to say then cleared his throat, desperately trying to speak around the lump in his throat.

"How bad is it?" This time, it was Director Fury's dark voice that permeated through his phone.

"Sir, it's ... _bad._" Clint didn't see any reason to sugarcoat it.

A silence followed his words, then Fury commanded, "We'll be there. Keep Rogers from doing anything irresponsible. Keeping him in one piece and sane is the least thing we could do for Romanoff."

"Copy that." Clint responded then he turned off his phone. He looked back at the horrible sight happening before him. Natasha so ... _mutilated._ Even when the worst of their missions happened, Natasha _always_ managed to get off pretty much unscathed.

A bullet here, a slash there. A bruise here, a sprain there.

But never _this. _

She also saved Clint's life too many times to count and he was ever grateful for that, and it tears him apart that he couldn't extend any help to her right now when she needed him most. _No. _It wasn't him that Natasha needed. It was _him. Steve. _Captain fucking America. And he let her down so tragically. Her and Steve's own child. If only he was around eight, nine months ago and wasn't in some deep-shit undercover work for SHIELD, he might have protected Natasha where Captain America didn't.

As it was, he couldn't turn back time, and he stalked out of the medbay, little tendrils of rage and hate weaving his heart tighter. He couldn't stand another minute looking at Steve looking worried for Natasha's safety and ready to kill the one who did it to her.

That fucking_ hypocrite._

Rogers should just kill himself.

* * *

Steve was rooted to the spot.

He couldn't move even if he wanted to. He already left Nat once, and he wasn't eager to do it again.

Blood were seeping through the floor from Natasha's wounds; Stark trying to clean up the mess with towels. Steve clenched his hands and gritted his teeth so hard that he could almost feel them breaking. He welcomed the pain because it was a fitting distraction from the numbness but at the same time rage he felt whenever he saw Natasha's broken form. Captain America has killed people, yes. but he never enjoyed it. However, Steve is positive that not only would he draw out the bastard's death who did this to Natasha, he would downright enjoy it. It was so uncharacteristic of him but at that moment he really didn't care. Right now, he could only watch as Banner and Tony tried to save her. He knew that it would probably be best if he got out of their way but he was terrified of losing sight of her. And their child.

"Tony, you need to recast her leg properly and have JARVIS scan her fully so we could assess the worst damage first. Have the crash cart ready; BP and her vitals might be dropping soon. Call Dr. Cho and tell her that we might need her earlier than I would care to admit." Bruce fired off.

"You got that, J?" Stark asked his servant while setting the bone in her right leg.

"Full body scan and analysis, commencing,"

Natasha, as deeply sedated as she was, moaned softly when her leg was moved again. "Easy there, Red. I'm just trying to get your leg into place, that's all. No need to get so worked up." Tony weakly joked. It fell on deaf ears though, because Natasha became still once again.

"Sir, I have found four broken ribs on the right ribcage, another two on the left ribcage with one of them shattered. Currently, as we are speaking, bone shards are penetrating Ms. Romanoff's left lung. Added to that, she sustained a quite severe head trauma, several knife slashes with the worse areas centered on her legs and chest, a broken right leg and patella, perforated spleen and liver and excised fingernails and beds." JARVIS reported.

"And the child?" Steve asked hoarsely. That also made him snap out of any trance he got himself into and though with shaky knees, he managed to walk to the wall adjacent to the operating table. "Is ... Is the baby okay?"

Jarvis was uncannily silent.

"JARVIS?" Steve addressed the thin air.

"I believe that you should calm down, Captain Rogers. I am monitoring an increased heart rate from you."

"JARVIS. Answer me. _Please._"

"Steve, it's probably better if you get out of the medbay for a while, maybe follow Clint?" Banner said softly.

"No, I'll stay here. Can't leave her." There was a shortness of breath that Steve hadn't experienced ever since he underwent Project: Rebirth.

"Rogers." A hard voice sounded out inside the room.

Steve looked up and saw Fury entering the medbay. Tagging along him was Agent Hill. And Dr. Helen Cho, who hurriedly went to Natasha's side. _Thank God._

"Maybe you should heed Dr. Banner's advice and get out of this room for a short while, Captain." Fury said. "That's an order."

"No. I can't. I can't leave her, Fury. Not again! Not this time!" Steve was getting worked up and as he did, his voice rose.

"We should probably use our indoor voices here, Cap." Fury admonished gently. "Listen to me. You've been without sleep for 72 hours right now, and I get that you are worried about Romanoff. Believe me, I am too, but it doesn't help her situation right now if we also have to deal with a frenzied Steve Rogers! You need to step aside."

That last sentence was the one who did it. Maybe Fury shouldn't have uttered it, especially to Captain America, but Steve going near insane wouldn't be conducive to Natasha's case right now.

"STEP ASIDE?! I've done that nine months ago and look where that got the woman I love! On an operating table, pregnant and barely alive! So don't you dare tell me to step aside, not when it comes to HER!"

He couldn't believe it. Fury was telling him to do the one thing he promised himself never to do to Natasha. He couldn't leave her. Not now, nor ever. Fury needed to understand that.

A keening noise from one of the machines hooked to Natasha drew everyone's attention.

Banner, Tony and Helen immediately shared measured gazes, but underneath that, there were panic in their eyes.

"Banner's lab. Right now." Dr. Cho told them forcefully.

Wheeling the bed Natasha was on, they immediately exited the medbay followed by Fury, Hill, and Rogers and went down the corridor then turned left. A sliding glass door opened for them and they were in Banner's lab in no time.

"What's happening?" Agent Hill asked Tony.

"She's going into shock. Time's against us. If we can't get her out of shock…" Tony trailed off but Hill understood. She looked back at Steve who looked pale and suddenly wan under the fluorescent lights. _How did we get here?_

The three doctors worked feverishly to make Natasha's vitals stable. Professional opinions were tossed around, all the while hands were working to piece her together. All the while bile was churning in Steve's gut.

"We could put her under the machine and have it knit the knife wounds and anything else that could be healed so it would lessen the pain…"

"Anaesthetics don't work.. Her blood's got something and we couldn't risk the child."

"_We don't have enough time!"_

Their words were swirling around Steve's mind, chasing each other like a pack of rabid dogs. He knew that they knew the best for Natasha but they were wasting precious time in arguing. In a miraculously strong voice, he made his suggestion known.

"You could deliver the child. Maybe then you can fi-fix her."

The three doctors shared a look; one that was one part consideration and another dubious. It was also tinged with something suspiciously like pity but he couldn't figure out why it was present.

_Pity? Something's not adding up._

It was Dr. Helen Cho who answered.

"Captain Rogers, we, uhh, we have reason to believe that there is no longer a child. Alive, that is."

* * *

Yes. I'm sorry for the cliffhanger but I happen to like those. You know the drill. Read and Review! :)

*thanks for lolsmileyface6 for pointing out that I downloaded the wrong document :)


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I AM SO SORRY. I really am. I wanted to update this but I hit a writer's block so.. :( as of the moment, even if I have to original plotline, I find it kinda hard to continue this :( if you guys have any idea for the plot or plot twists I would love it :) Enjoy!

* * *

A twinkling laugh permeated the heavy fog that seems to be a permanent fixture in Natasha's brain. When she opened her eyes, she found herself in a desolate room. Well, room might be stretching it a little bit because there were no walls to speak off. However, it was blindingly white, and the glare hurt Natasha's eyes. It reminded her of a mission where she had to rescue an scientist in Siberia in the dead of winter and the surrounding had been so.. barren and desolate.

Looking down, she saw that she was wearing a light floral summer dress, the straps criss-crossing at her back, and the hem ended just below her knee. It was so girly, and so … innocent. Black Widow never wore things girly and innocent. Sure, she wore dresses that flatter her figure and displays her assets to the fullest, but when she wasn't wearing those (and mostly she only wore them on missions and dates) she was usually in her leather catsuit or training clothes.

She never wore something so not Black Widow and she was confused. And she was even more baffled when she felt a tug on her dress. Turning, she was floored when she looked directly into Steve's eyes.

Steve's eyes set in a child's face.

With her unmistakable titian hair.

The child reached out his little arms to her, prompting her to crouch down and level her eyes with him. Natasha let her eyes roam over his cherubic face, and when the child noticed that she wasn't embracing him, a little furrow appeared between his eyebrows. Natasha nearly doubled-back in shock because it was a tick she saw in the mirror every time she was worried about something. As she was processing this information, apparently the child became impatient because he threw his chubby little arms around her neck and just _hugged_ her._  
_

"Mama!" the child babbled in her hair.

Natasha knew somewhere deep inside that this is her child. Her and _Steve's_ child. However, she was unprepared for the extreme emotions barreling inside her the moment the child claimed her as his mother. When she was still pregnant, she thought of the child in an intangible sense, there, but not really something that she could truly interact with. Not someone who can tug her dress, make her crouch, hug her, and make her heart overflow with what she now knew as love.

Love. That was what she felt for this little boy. Unconditional love. The thought of anything hurting him made her vision go dangerously red. Damn if she let anything touch her son.

Her son didn't let up the chokehold he has on her but that was fine, because she was putting her own arms around his small body as well. She hugged him as tightly as she dared. He was still a kid after all, and she was Black Widow.

"Hello, darling. Hello, James," she said, emotions threatening to congest her voice. She breathed in his own unique baby scent, but underneath that, James was every bit the same as his father. He even smelled the same, too. Clean with just a hint of something that makes it exceptionally Steve's.

Natasha closed her eyes, savoring the moment. It might be a minute, it might have been an hour but James eventually tried to tug out of her embrace. She let him, absorbing each detail on her son's perfect face. Eyes, nose, mouth, cheeks. _Oh, look! Dimples!_

James was perfect.

James smiled at her impishly, and again it reminded her of Steve whenever he was on the verge of something that would ultimately result in her saying "No," or "Don't do that," or "That's stupid," or even "More."

Her son turned away from her and ran after something and that was then that she noticed her surroundings has changed. Instead of stark white, the place was now awash in green grass, a glistening lake nearby and a lone tree shielding her from the bright yellow sun.

She watched as James hopped up and down, trying to catch a butterfly. She gazed at the idyllic picture of happiness James made for her. She smiled, and suddenly, two strong arms were encircling her from behind.

She wasn't startled, because she knew that it was Steve. His masculine scent wafted to her nose, a more potent and intoxicating version of James'. Steve's head rested on her left shoulder and she leaned into him. Together, they watched their son play and laugh.

Then the scene flickered.

Natasha thought it was just her, maybe she has just blinked or something, but in the next moment, James looked at her in alarm. Her senses were immediately put on alert, body tense to exterminate whatever threat presented itself. However, the arms around her began to tighten, and not in a good way. Steve's scent was replaced with an overpowering odor laced with evil that can only be from Alexei.

_"__You think you can escape us, Natalia? You thought wrong." _Alexei told her in a menacing voice. Natasha struggled with all her might but it Alexei wasn't budging an inch. _"You think you're safe up in that pretentious tower? You think you and everyone you are will live a life of happiness when you are a monster?"_ Natasha tried to scream but nothing was coming out from her. It wasn't because of Alexei crushing her but her voice box felt _paralyzed. _

A different kind of paralysis engulfed her as he looked at James. James was crying, running towards her with all the strength his little legs could muster, but the distance wasn't lessening. He was stuck as much as he was, the only difference was he was also shouting "Mama! Mama!" at the top of his lungs.

Natasha struggled against Alexei with a new resolve. It was frantic, almost crazy, but she had to go to James. _"You can't win against us! Everything you hold dear will die, and when the light in their eyes has faded and you feel each and every thing of their agony will we come after you." _Tears were coursing down her face, and she didn't let up screaming even though she all she heard were silence and Alexei's voice.

The skies were suddenly overcast, the sun covered by the ominous clouds. The wind picked up, and Natasha thought she heard other voices. Voices that belonged to her former teammates.

_"__We could put her under the machine and have it knit the knife wounds and anything else that could be healed so it would lessen the pain…"_

_"Anaesthetics don't work.. Her blood's got something and we couldn't risk the child."_

"_We don't have enough time!"_

And then pain of another kind made itself known. Every part of her body ached with torment. She felt every injury Alexei inflicted on her when she was kidnapped. Along with the awareness of the pain came also the memories. She flinched, and she closed her eyes _for a moment._

_"You could deliver the child. Maybe then you can fi-fix her."_

Steve's voice.

Wait, what? Deliver the child? But James was already here in front of her!

A new cry of Mama caught her attention. It was different from the others because while the others were merely terrified, this cry was pained, as if someone was hurting James. _"Look at __малый__James. Crying out for a mother who wasn't able to protect him. Remember our promise, Natalia. You will beleft with nothing because we are taking it all. Starting with your little son." _The pressure around her from Alexei's arms suddenly vanished and she ran towards her son. Natasha seemed to be stuck just like James was at first, but she was able to gradually reach her son. Just a foot shy of James, however, the voices in the wind spoke again.

_"Captain Rogers, we, uhh, we have reason to believe that there is no longer a child. Alive, that is."__  
_

NO!

Natasha looked back at her crying son, horrified to see him slowly crumble away to dust. It began at his feet, and it crept up to his legs and hips.

"No! No, James! Stay with Mama, baby. No!" Natasha sobbed. She stretched herself as much as she could but she couldn't reach James no matter what. Her son was now howling with pain, his legs and stomach now turned to dust.

"Mama! Mama!" the little boy cried out. Whatever was preventing James from reaching her now affected her again. This time, she couldn't budge no matter how much she moved or stretched and she was forced to witness whatever was turning James into dust made its way into his shoulders and his neck, silencing his tortured "Mama's". "No, Oh God, no. James!" Natasha yelled. It crept up his face where it left Jame's right eye last. She tried to buck against whatever was holding her down but it was of no use. Natasha watched, with tearful and tortured heart, as the last part of her son, _James, _turned grey and became dust.

Abruptly, she was released from her invisible bonds but she didn't care. Alexei and whatever force it was might as well have suffocated her. She had just watched her son, calling for her help and sanctuary, crumble into nothing but dust. She knelt down the mound of ashes that were previously her son. Extending a hand, she tried to touch it but found she couldn't. Instead, she looked up to the heavens and screamed her heart out.

And everything faded to black.

* * *

"What do you mean 'no child'? Alive? Dr. Cho, you must be... No, you're wrong. Our child is alive," Steve said tortuously. "I felt him kick myself! There's no way the child's dead!"

All set of eyes were on the Dr. Cho.

"Uh, Captain Rogers, the machines are not detecting a fetal heartbeat for the past hour. It implies that the fetus, I mean, the baby, is no longer alive," Helen said. "I think what you felt may be just an aberration. The baby might have been alive when he kicked, but right now, the heartbeat just isn't there," Helen's voice was grim and sorry.

Silence reigned in the room. Steve slid soundlessly down the floor, cradling his head and muttering "No, no, no. This can't happen," while the rest of the team just stared at Natasha dumbstruck. Dr. Cho went to Natasha's bedside and spoke, "However, it is imperative that we save Natasha or at least try to mitigate the pain she's feeling. According to her files, she has received a version of Dr. Erskine's serum, no matter how twisted it was by the Red Room. It is, unfortunately, not as strong as the original formula. She can still go into shock and die. The best thing that we can do for her right now is tend to her and deliver the child later."

At first nobody moved, but Bruce came around and started to prep the machine that would knit the knife wounds marring Nat's skin. The machine went whirring and beeped and Natasha was slowly encased by the machine. Banner turned to them after a moment and said, "If that is the case, then we best do damage control first. After the more minor wounds are attended to, we can put her through surgery to remove the shards embedded in her lungs." The good doctor seemed grimmer the more he spoke. "After that, we can decide what to do with the baby. There are still a few more unknown variables we need to know and put into consideration before we can do anything for certain."

"How much time?" The hollow sounding voice came from Steve. "How much time does this machine take? How long until we know what to do with the baby?" He stood up and went to the machine saving Nat's life. He could see inside, see the battered face of

"An hour or two, tops. The initial blood tests I ran with J were teeming with an unidentifiable substance. We don't know yet what it is made of or what it does but as Bruce said, we need all the variables before we can do something definitive," Tony answered. He looked at Steve for a moment and then signal the others to go out of the room. Hill and Fury immediately went out and was followed by Dr. Cho after she had a last look at the machines. Bruce went next and touched Steve's shoulder in a consoling manner then he went out too. Tony was the only one left in the room.

"Cap, for what it's worth, it's not only you who committed a mistake. We all are equally to blame. Don't be too hard on yourself; I know little Red's gonna be against you blaming yourself. As for the child..." Tony trailed off. Steve was still looking at Nat's face through the glass, but there was a telltale glistening of tears in his eyes. One that Steve desperately tried to hold back but cannot. Tony thought that if the same should ever happen to Pepper and their child, well... Steve is a stronger man than Tony would ever be. Tony squeezed Steve's shoulder in a show of support and started for the hallway. The glass doors shut behind him and he heard JARVIS call him.

"Sir, if I may, the tests that you ran earlier has just been concluded. Doctors Cho and Helen are waiting for you in the office." The AI's voice gave nothing but Tony was still worried. Upon arriving in his office, Bruce stood up and handed a piece of paper towards him.

"Tony, you better take a look." Bruce said.

Tony's eyes read the first line of the result. "Wait, is this real?" Tony asked dumbstruck.

"I'm afraid it is, Mr. Stark. I'm afraid it is," Dr. Cho said.

* * *

_*_малый – little

Please R&amp;R! :)


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Hello. *Ducks everything thrown at me.* I'm sorry, I'm sorry. :( I really thought I could have updated this sooner but life happened. You know those funny experiences where your writing foreshadows what's about to happen to you in real life? Yeah that kinda happened to me. Hence, my long absence from this fic. But I'm here now, and my life is kinda ordered, more or less.

Anyways, enjoy! Leave a review and I'll finish this, don't worry.

* * *

Tony, Bruce, and Helen walked in a room.

_That would've been a start of a good joke,_ Tony thought had he not been holding this blasted piece of paper in his hands.

In all the history of the world that he knows and that he knows is possible, this shouldn't have happened. Tony wasn't a believer in miracles, but this is nothing short of one. He snorted inwardly, thinking that miracles ought to be benevolent in form and idea but this is the farthest miracle-_miracle_ there is.

There was no child.

There was no child inside Natasha's womb.

Not alive, not dead either.

There simply is nothing.

"How can this be, Helen? She's pregnant, wasn't she? Or isn't she? Fuck, this is a doozy. Tell me someone else is also as crazed by this as I am," Tony sank to the nearest tabletop in the office.

"I am not sure yet, but best case scenario? Whatever fluid inside Ms. Romanoff right now appears to be stabilizing her, or her pregnancy at least. I am terribly out of my depth here as you are, Mr. Stark." Helen told them. "She appears to believe the pregnancy is still ongoing and that the baby inside her, _or isn't inside her_, is still inside."

Bruce took the StarkPad from the table and scrolled through the raw data gleaned from the first batch of results JARVIS ran. "Blood pressure …. Hormones …. Everything else looks normal here, Tony. It really looks like as if Natasha is experiencing a normal pregnancy."

"But the fetus isn't there?" Tony redundantly said.

"…it's not. It simply isn't there." Bruce said in a soft and bewildered voice.

"We need to run more thorough scans on Ms. Romanoff, Mr. Stark. I'm sure between Mr. Banner, you, and myself that we can sort this out." Helen smiled weakly, trying to inject a bit of steel in her voice. _A woman, a mother, should never experience this._ As long as Helen could help, she was going to see the Black Widow and her child well.

"JARVIS can you please do a full set of tests for Natasha?" Tony asked the disembodied voice above.

"Of course, Mr. Stark," the AI echoed, "However, Mr. Stark, Dr. Cho, and Mr. Bruce, I would like to call to attention a small injury that I'm afraid I have omitted due to its comparatively healed state on Ms. Romanoff."

Everyone stilled.

"What injury?" Bruce asked hesitatingly. His troubled countenance was also echoed by Tony and Helen as well.

"When I was accounting for Ms. Romanoff's injury, I naturally ordered them from the worst to the bad. However, due to the nature of the emergency, I have failed to also account for the comparatively healed wounds and injuries on Ms. Romanoff when we were trying to save her."

"Get to the point, JARVIS." Tony rang out. He had a very bad feeling about this.

"Ms. Romanoff has a five-inch scar just below her stomach. It appears as if the scar is months old, but incorporating Ms. Romanoff's healing rate and the scar being sealed by laser, it appears as if nothing but a thin white line, barely perceptible in the first glance," the AI explained in a somber tone. Contrary to what everyone believes, Tony had JARVIS calibrate his emotions and even his sarcasm level to attune to the situation. Tony could've kissed the brilliance of his younger self because he honestly thought that had JARVIS delivered this piece of news with a clinical voice and detachment, he and the others might've lost it.

"Are you saying that there is no child because… because the child is already out of Natasha's womb?" Helen asked in an incredulous voice.

Tony couldn't believe it. Natasha had looked every bit as pregnant as she was in the video. But then again, she looked pregnant now and apparently, she's not.

"Oh dear God, this is fucked up." Bruce said out of the blue.

Tony couldn't even respond to that unusual quip by Bruce. He was busy digesting the fact that Natasha was pregnant, had her child cut out of her, and still managed to think she was pregnant.

Just what did those fuckers do to her in that hellhole?

"It appears so, Dr. Cho. The liquid inside Ms. Romanoff seems to be amniotic fluid as well yet there are trace amounts of another serum that is alien to both the Red Room's and Dr. Erskine's formula. It also appears that it isn't strengthening anything within Ms. Romanoff but rather … communicating, for lack of a better word."

* * *

Steve couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from Natasha's prone form. She was inside the ICU unit after Helen's machine stabilized her and knitted together her wounds. She was still bound for surgery later but as of the moment, she's safe.

His eyes drifted towards the bulge in the soft blanket that covered Natasha.

_How could I have turned my back on them?_

He knew berating and kicking himself wouldn't do anything good to Natasha yet he couldn't stop blaming himself. He couldn't bear to think about when Natasha would open her eyes, _and they will open_, and all he could see would be contempt and hate for him.

Now, won't that be grand? He did the exact same to her back when he unfairly threw her out of his life. Natasha doing it to him would be exactly what he deserved.

The quiet hum of all the machines surrounding her, the regular beats of heart, and the peaceful yet tired look on her face all tugged at his heart. _She shouldn't be here._

Steve couldn't bear to go near Natasha and enter the ICU unit, so the scrubs that Tony had given him earlier still lay clutched on his hands. The pull to touch Natasha again was strong, but he wanted to go find Tony or Bruce or Helen and ask what's wrong with their child.

Their child.

God, their child.

He rose up, took one last look at Natasha, and headed down the hallway towards the office that the three were currently holed up in.

He knocked on the door, and a beat or two passed before the knob was turned and Helen let him inside.

"Mr. Rogers, I was just about to call you," Helen looked up to the face of Captain America. Though at this moment, he was as far removed as he can be with the visage of the strong, stalwart hero. Helen didn't blame him.

Steve walked into the room and took a seat against the wall. Once he had settled himself in, he looked at the three grim faces staring back at him and uttered the only thing he can say.

"Talk."

_Now that's just not right. _Bruce thought. Steve normally has the voice of confidence, both literally and figuratively. But just that single word was enough to convey how much Steve can take right now.

"Steve, we… I mean, JARVIS… Natasha was pregnant." Bruce was the first one to break the silence.

Steve looked at the face of his friend, and with a hollow yet controlled voice asked, "'Was?'"

Helen jumped in, "Yes, was. As far as we know, Mr. Rogers, Natasha _was_ indeed pregnant. Yet she isn't now." At Steve's bewildered expression, she continued. "It appears that at some point in the not-so-distant past, she had undergone a Cesarean section and the fet-_child _, was taken. It only appears that she is pregnant now because apparently her amniotic sac was re-engineered."

"But I felt the child kick! When we were in the Quinjet, I …" Steve trailed off.

"As the sac was re-engineered, we have cause to believe that the fluid inside was also. It holds a third, distinct serum that is quite different from yours or Ms. Romanoff's serum. This particular serum holds … _communicative_ properties that we believe are the reason why you felt a kick when you were rushing her in." Helen responded.

Steve didn't say anything. Didn't say anything for a long while. The tension in the room thickened so much to the point that Tony was about to address Steve when Steve himself cut him off.

"So, in short, our child is probably in the hands of the people responsible for her abduction?" He said in a calm, short tone.

"Yes, and because of the serum, he probably is still alive, Cap." Tony said softly. "But, again, the odds are—" he wasn't able to finish his sentence because Steve suddenly stood up.

"Then suit up. We are going after my child and I will get him back to his or her mother. Natasha will see our child even if it is the last thing I'll do." Steve said with all the authority he could muster, and at that moment, Captain America shone through his eyes and his tone.

But Tony had a bad feeling about this.

* * *

"Cap, Cap! Hey Steve, wait up!" Tony said as he rushed beside Steve. Yet Steve didn't stop or slow down. His stark face was there for all to see, yet underneath all that, the resolve Captain America is known for showed.

"You can't just go about punching things and people, Cap," Tony reminded him as they turned a corridor into the Tower's armory. The doors opened with a whiz and they stepped inside. Steve immediately went to his own personal armory, a veritable shrine of blue, red, and white. Tony thought it was funny when he was designing it. There was a replica of the shield made by his father on the wall that signaled the small alcove as his own. There were other alcoves along the walls that served as a stockroom of sorts for every Avengers in the Tower. Tony went crazy decorating them, too, and he was damn proud of it. He could've been a kickass interior designer if it wasn't for his genius-billionaire-playboy-philanthropist image.

"We need to think about this thoroughly, and not just my usual 'I have a plan. Attack.' plan of attack," Tony said. "We need to be smart about this."

Steve stepped into a platform and JARVIS silently outfitted him with his Captain America suit. It was a nifty trick of Stark to integrate how he suits up with the rest of the Avengers' suits. It saves time especially when they were on time-sensitive missions.

The doors whizzed again and inside stepped Clint, Fury, and Hill. Clint was already suited up, and so was Fury, not that Steve ever saw Fury in anything else but that long coat of his.

"For once, Tony, you are right. Our plan is to attack. Find my child, give him/her to Natasha, and then make those bastards pay," Steve grabbed a few other gadgets and then turned to them. "I will make it right for Natasha."

Clint's face looked like it was carved from granite, but he nodded. Clint and Fury were both briefed by Hill about Natasha's unusual situation.

"Damn it, Steve! You can't just attack the base!" Tony said. "You attack the base, save your child, then return to Natasha. What then? Do you think Natasha will be okay? No! We need to learn more about her condition and I do not think that you destroying that base is actually beneficial to us!"

"What do you want us to do, Tony?" Clint asked him, turning his tense body towards the man.

"I'm only saying that we need to be smart about this." Tony said.

"Stark's right. I have a hunch that everything is not as it seems with Romanoff," Fury interjected "You can't afford to destroy the base any more than you destroyed it leaving. If Natasha was held there for a time, it would make sense that there are information there about the things they were doing to her."

Everyone looked at Steve.

Steve's face faltered for a bit, but then he regrouped. "Fine, we'll do a reconnaissance mission. Stealth in and out, find any lab and computer and download information pertinent to Natasha and my child."

Tony nodded. "J? We'll need you to do some serious hacking. Not that it's hard for you."

"Of course, Mr. Stark. Anything to help the Avengers."


End file.
